ذكرى العاهرات من شارع سيرجنت: عبدالحميد البرنس

فصل روائي

درجتْ أماندا تلك الأيام على أن تترك الباب وراءها مواربا. لا هي نفتني لرحمة القدر فأمتثل. لا هي استقرت بين أحضاني.

تركتني هناك، ما بين السماء والأرض، في حال من انعدام الوزن، محاطا تماما بالفراغ، لا عنب الشام طالت يدي، لا أصابني قضم من بلح “اليمن السعيد”. أوصلتني بكيدِ أنثى حاذقة إلى تلك النقطة التي يصعب معها المضي قدما أو التراجع.

حبيبي.. أعترف أنني كنت مذنبة. كنت أعلم، صغيري، بعمق شعورك نحوي لحظة أن تركتك كل مرة حائرا متسائلا. أتمنى حبيبي أن تكون محتفظا بذات الشعور نحوي. لا لشيء، يا وليم، سوى أنني ظللت أشعر بقوة كذلك تجاه ما يوحدني بك. إنني راغبة حبيبي أن أكون لك، لك أنت وحدك. أجدني صغيري في أشد الندم حين أتذكر تلك الطريقة التي لا تخلو من قسوة.. التي ظللت أعاملك بها آنذاك. كل شيء في طريقه، حبيبي، إلى أن يتغير. إنني مهيأة الآن فقط لبدء حياتي معك. كيف لا! وقد ظللتَ حبيبي تُعلِّمني أشياء لم أكن أعلم بها. أتطلع، صغيري، بكياني كله، أن أكون زوجة لك.. أمّا لأطفالك، هل تقبل يا وليم؟

ذلك عهد، وذلك عهد آخر كانت أماندا ماران بون نفسها تضعني خلاله، أنا قطعة اللحم المُتبل المنفصل عن روحه لا مراء، على جمر الرغبة ورياح الشوق إليها تعصف هناك داخل سراويلي الناشفة. تقلبني رويَّةً رويَّةً بقصص غرامياتها في ماض لم يكن لي فيه من وجود وإن قادت طرقه كلها في الأخير إلى عالمي ذاك المفتقر إلى العطف والحنان والرفقة أو الحبّ. تصبّ على فراشي عصير ليمون الوعد. تُذيقني قُبلة. ربما أكثر. تبتسم بولع الجلاد الروماني القديم نفسه، قبل أن تختفي من حياتي كما اقتحمتها، فجأة. في أثناء كل ذلك، لا تني أماندا ماران بون تشاركني الأنخاب، تجالسني مؤانسة، تتحدث بمرح طفولي ما عن أشياء صغيرة للحبّ، مثل نموّ تلك الشعرة الغريبة عند منتصف مُحيّاي، قائلة:

“وليم! إنها شعرة وحيدة، حبيبي”!

كانت تمنحني باختصار كل شيء تقريبا، حتى إمكانية أن أكتشف مفاتيح قوامها ذاك المتناسق، وكلانا عار تماما، إلا من قطعة سروال داخلي، لكنّ أماندا ماران بون لم تمكني أبدا على مدار تلك اللقاءات المتباعدة من رؤية النبع بعين موضوعي الخاصّ مرة واحدة. كنت أواصل السير، قرابة العامين، منقسما حدّ الرثاء على نفسي، متأرجحا يوما بعد يوم على حافة اليأس والأمل. لقد بدا لي واضحا جليّا خلال دروس التعذيب تلك أن أماندا ماران بون كانت تؤمن على الرغم من حداثة سنها بحكمة أن الرجال منذ قديم الأزل إذا ما قضوا وطرهم فسيقلعون مبكرا نحو مصبّات أخرى، ولا عزاء.

الحال، ظللتُ أطفئ ما اندلع من بركان الشهوة المتأجج داخل قمقمه بعلاقات عابرة. لم يتبق هناك من صبري الكثير. ذلك بالضبط ما أرادت أماندا ماران بون منذ البداية وخططت له ونفذت أدق تفاصيله بلهفة وحكمة سفينة تتهادى أخيرا بين صخور الشطء الطحلبية الملساء صوب مرفأها الأحبّ آمنة ظافرة. كان لا بد إذن للنهر المنبجس من أعماق حرمان عريق أن يشق طريقه باندفاع المنابع الأولى، حِيل الالتفاف حول العقبات، مهارة القفز فوق الهضاب، الولع بخلخلة الصخور الصماء، وحكمة الوصول إلى المصبّ بأقلّ قدر ممكن من الأضرار أو الخسائر. الحال، بدأتُ أهبط في مثل تلك الأوقات إلى شارع “سيرجنت”. شارع العاهرات الشهير في وسط المدينة. أتمعن في وجوه بائعات اللذة على جانبي الشارع. أختار ما قد يبدو لي من بين أنفاس الخمر الثقيلة أكثرهن نضارة وبعدا من شِراك تلك الأدواء القاتلة. هناك كشفت نفسي عن مواهب دفينة في مساومة عاهر على ما بين فخذيها بسماحة روح ضلت طريقها من عصر الأنقياء. أتفق معها على مبلغ. أحيانا، أبذل الوعد صدقة خالصة بكأس من الفودكا أو الويسكي. كنّ يدركن جيدا أن ما يحدث أمر لا علاقة له بالصدقات. أعمال البر والخير في المدينة تسير على قدم وساق. الكنائس تفتح أبوابها في وجه السائلين. طعم لقمة العمل أكثر حلاوة. كما أن الكأس الواحدة قد تجلب كأسا أخرى فيضيع عليهن سوق الليلة بأكمله. تنتهي المساومة، بحمد الله أخيرا. لا ضغائن. نسير في إثرها معا مغذّيين الخطى مثل غريبين حقيقيين لم تجمع من قبل بينهما ذكرى صوب أكثر أشياء هذا العالم ألفة وسعة في الدفء وحميمية بل معرفة راسخة وهياما وحبا: السرير.

لا نكاد على طول الطريق نتبادل كلمة واحدة..

لا ملاطفة بينكَ وبينها، لا إيماءة غزل، لا لمسة طفيفة، لا فواتح لشهيّةٍ في طعم البهار قائمة هناك على سكة عابر، لا كلمة حانية، لا حتى رغبة أخرى في معرفة شفرات الغرام السرية للآخر. ذلك أن الأسواق منذ قديم الزمن مناطق خالية تماما من العاطفة. السوق سوق. ما بين هذا البائع وذاك الشاري “يفتح الله أو يستر”. هناك دائما أمران لا ثالث لهما: الحاجة والسلعة في ميزان القوة الشرائية أو الربح. حتى التحايا لا وجود لها هناك. “أريد ما بين فخذيك، الآن”، أقول عادة، كما لو أنني أتعمد ألا أُظهر شغفا ببضاعة كاسدة. تخرج الكلمات ميتة من فمي. هي لا تتردد ثانية أخرى. إلا أن لها العين الفاحصة في التمييز بين زبون وآخر. تقول بتثاؤب ولا مبالاة. كما لو أنها تقف على جانب سيرجنت في انتظار لا أحد. سوى الفرجة على المارة. “أجل، يمكنك أن تناله الآن، ولكن يا هذا كم تدفع لقاء هذا”؟ أقول ببرود “عشرا”. تشيح بوجهها مستنكرة. ثم تقرر “لا. أعطيني الضعف، يا هذا، أم أنك تحسب فرجي هذا حفنة ملح أم ماذا”؟ أقول بعد تفكير “حسنا، خمسة عشر دولارا، لا أزيد”. أهمّ بالرحيل. كن يقلن أحيانا “إذن خذ ذلك المبلغ. ضاجع به أمّك”. كذلك بدا بعضهن في المحصلة وقحا. هل توجد عاهر هناك في هذا العالم الوسيع المترامي لا نصيب لها من وقاحة؟

في مرة ما، رأيت إحداهنّ في شارع تورنتو الجانبي المعتم أسفل أشجار الآش العملاقة المتعاقبة. تجاوزتها بينما تسير الهوينى. كانت تُدعى سارا. بدا من تلك المشيّة برغم ظلال العتمة أنها مبتدئة. تلكأت مديرا مفتاح البناية الخارجي في ثقب البوابة. لحظة أن اقتربتْ مني كثيرا، قلت لها بصوت بدت حوافة مشرشره كما لو أن الحاجة الماسة لعبت فيه بمنشار:

“هل لكِ رغبة في تناول كأس معي”؟

مكثتْ بعدها عندي نحو لثلاث ليال.

كانت سارا خلاسيّة دون العشرين. لم يُستهلك جسدها الغضّ بعد. بدت مع تقدم الشرب والوقت كما لو أنها لن تتوقف عن الكلام. كان شكلها من الغرابة بمكان داخل جلباب أبيض كنت محتفظا به لرغبة ظلّتْ تلح عليّ بالذهاب لتأدية صلاة العيدين في القاهرة من عام لعام. وكنت لا أزال أعيش على إعانة المهاجرين الجدد. ربما لهذا، لم تأخذ مني دولارا واحدا. قالت إنها فقط تقوم بتدشين نفسها لسبب لم تذكره كعاهر. لم أعلق. “إيّاك والنبش في جحر علاقات العاهر الماضية”. لدهشتي، قالت إنها ستحتفظ بالجلباب. وهي تغادرني، قالت كلاما آخر أوهمتها أنّه قد جرحني. قالت: “ليس بمثل ذلك السوء النوم يا هذا مع غريب”. قلت بما قد بدا الأسى “هو كذلك، يا صغيرتي”. بغتة، صفعتني بعيد باب الشقة.

وأخذتْ وراءها الباب بعنف.

لا بد أن على وجهي شيء يغري بصفعة. أخذتُ أشعر بذلك الضيق الخانق، فور انصرافها، ذلك أن موضوعي الخاصّ سبب لي الكثير من الآلام. كنت أنظر إليه بتأفف وهو قابع هناك ما بين ساقي. الوغد، لسبب ما، شرع في الضحك، قائلا:

“كن شجاعا واستأصَّلني”!

تلقيتُ الصفع على وجهي بنسب متفاوتة في عنفها. صفعات الوالدين، صفعات الأساتذة في المدارس، وغيرهم، لم أختبر صفعة عملاء أمن النظام. قرأت عنها وسمعت عنها أثناء كتابة طلبات اللجوء المقدمة في القاهرة إلى مكتب الأمم المتحدة. كل تلك الصفعات. لكنّ أسى هذه الصفعة نجم عن كونها حدثت في لحظة ما من الأمان. لم ألتقِ سارا بعدها. وإن كان ثمة فضول ما ظلّ يعاودني لمعرفة ما حدث لها على سكة مهنتها الجديدة. أحيانا، أجدني أقول مبتسما مع ذلك:

“يا للعاهرات من سيرجنت”!

كان بعضهن لا يتحرك معك خطوة قبل أن يقبض على السعر مقدما. شرفهن الكلمة لا خداع. أخريات كن في عِداد عامِلاتٍ في أسواق الأوراق المالية. لا يتورعن عن إمكانية أن يكون أحد أعمامهنّ صديقا زائرا لك بينما يدلفن إلى الشقة وراءك.

“يا للعاهرات من سيرجنت”!

من قبل أن تُغلق أنت الباب وراءك جيدا، يكن قد ارتمين على أقرب سرير، بينما أعينهن تقلب في أثناء مضاجعة الديك تلك في عتمة الغرفة، بحثا ربما عن أسهم زبون ما محتمل على ناصية قريبة وأخرى من شارع سيرجنت نفسه. لا قُبلة هناك.

“يا للعاهرات من سيرجنت”!

كنّ لا يخلعن ما عليهن من ثياب سوى ما كان ضرورة لإنهاء التعاقد بأسرع وقت. نادرا ما كن يرتدين سراويل داخلية. قبل حضورهن الوامض ذاك كقذيفة نطفة، حسب الراسخين في شؤون الدعارة، عليك أن تأخذ حذرك على أبواب الهبوط إلى سيرجنت وتخفي جيدا ما زاد ثمنه وخفّ حمله من متاع. أما البنطال، بيت المحفظة، وقد رميتَ به أنت نفسك عند بوابة اللقاء إلى جانب السرير على عجل؛ فذلك أول ما قد تهرع إليه يداك حين يهدأ هناك في جسدك كل عصب وخلجة.

“يا للعاهرات من سيرجنت”!

كن يعرفن جيدا طريق العودة إلى خارج الشقة بمفردهن. هكذا هنّ على الدوام، يغبن عن حياتك، محض نساء ينطوين على حزن ما غامض عابرات ذاهبات عن عالمك كما جئن إليه أول مرة خطفا، وحيدات بائسات غارقات مثلك في الوحل، مغادرات دنياك للأبد بلا ذكرى ولا حنين. تجلس أنت وحدك تفكر مطرقا داخل صمت الشقة المطبق وقد زال عنك وجع ذلك الاحتقان إلى حين أن كليكما لم يكن منذ بداية التعاقد حتى نهايته قد ألقى مجرد نظرة مترويّة إلى وجه الآخر.

“يا للعاهرات من سيرجنت”!

“يا للعاهرات من سيرجنت”!

واحدة منهنّ، رنَّ جرس هاتفها المحمول لحظة ما بدا منتصف المضاجعة. القحبة! أجابتْ على المكالمة لدهشتي. كان مكبر الصوت يجعل المتحدثة وسط صراخ طفوليّ على الجانب الآخر من خطّ الهاتف كما لو أنها تتحدث على بعد لمسة داخل غرفة النوم ذات النوافذ الزجاجية العارية من ستارة. لم تعر مسألة أنني لا أزال أواصل الصعود والهبوط بين فخذيها. لكأن شيئا لا يحدث. قالت من بين أنفاسها اللاهثة: “صبرا، شقيقتي، إنني أعمل الآن”. أغلقتْ السماعة. كان موضوعي الخاصّ بدأ يفقد صلابته بالفعل. قلت على إثرها بتسليم: “يمكنك الذهاب، الآن”. قالت بذعر: “طفلتي”. تابعتها بينما تلملم ذاتها على عجل. وتندفع بالجزع نفسه إلى خارج الشقة. كما لو أن صفقة عادت بخسارة لم يتبعها ندم!!

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  42. Right here is the right blog for anybody who would like to understand this topic. You know a whole lot its almost tough to argue with you (not that I personally will need to…HaHa). You definitely put a brand new spin on a topic that has been written about for many years. Excellent stuff, just great!

  43. An outstanding share! I have just forwarded this onto a friend who has been conducting a little homework on this. And he actually ordered me lunch due to the fact that I found it for him… lol. So allow me to reword this…. Thank YOU for the meal!! But yeah, thanx for spending some time to discuss this subject here on your internet site.

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  67. Can I just say what a comfort to uncover an individual who actually understands what they’re discussing over the internet. You definitely understand how to bring a problem to light and make it important. A lot more people should read this and understand this side of your story. I was surprised that you are not more popular since you certainly have the gift.

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  70. When I initially commented I seem to have clicked the -Notify me when new comments are added- checkbox and from now on every time a comment is added I get four emails with the exact same comment. Perhaps there is an easy method you can remove me from that service? Cheers!

  71. An outstanding share! I’ve just forwarded this onto a coworker who has been doing a little research on this. And he actually bought me dinner because I stumbled upon it for him… lol. So let me reword this…. Thank YOU for the meal!! But yeah, thanx for spending some time to discuss this issue here on your website.

  72. Howdy, I think your website could be having browser compatibility issues. Whenever I take a look at your blog in Safari, it looks fine however, when opening in I.E., it’s got some overlapping issues. I merely wanted to provide you with a quick heads up! Aside from that, great site!

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  78. Having read this I believed it was rather enlightening. I appreciate you finding the time and effort to put this content together. I once again find myself spending way too much time both reading and posting comments. But so what, it was still worth it!

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  87. An outstanding share! I have just forwarded this onto a co-worker who was conducting a little homework on this. And he actually bought me lunch simply because I stumbled upon it for him… lol. So let me reword this…. Thanks for the meal!! But yeah, thanx for spending the time to talk about this topic here on your blog.

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  112. After I initially commented I seem to have clicked the -Notify me when new comments are added- checkbox and from now on each time a comment is added I recieve 4 emails with the exact same comment. Is there a way you are able to remove me from that service? Kudos!

  113. Hi, I do think this is an excellent site. I stumbledupon it 😉 I will return once again since i have saved as a favorite it. Money and freedom is the best way to change, may you be rich and continue to help other people.

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  125. You’re so interesting! I don’t suppose I’ve read anything like this before. So nice to discover another person with original thoughts on this subject matter. Really.. thank you for starting this up. This website is something that is required on the internet, someone with a little originality!

  126. Good day! I could have sworn I’ve visited this site before but after looking at a few of the posts I realized it’s new to me. Anyhow, I’m certainly delighted I stumbled upon it and I’ll be book-marking it and checking back often!

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  131. Howdy! This blog post could not be written any better! Going through this post reminds me of my previous roommate! He always kept preaching about this. I most certainly will send this post to him. Fairly certain he’ll have a good read. I appreciate you for sharing!

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  133. Howdy! This article could not be written much better! Going through this post reminds me of my previous roommate! He continually kept preaching about this. I most certainly will send this post to him. Pretty sure he will have a very good read. I appreciate you for sharing!

  134. Having read this I believed it was really enlightening. I appreciate you spending some time and energy to put this informative article together. I once again find myself personally spending way too much time both reading and posting comments. But so what, it was still worthwhile!

  135. Oh my goodness! Impressive article dude! Many thanks, However I am encountering difficulties with your RSS. I don’t understand the reason why I am unable to subscribe to it. Is there anybody else getting identical RSS problems? Anyone that knows the solution will you kindly respond? Thanks!!

  136. Having read this I thought it was really informative. I appreciate you taking the time and energy to put this informative article together. I once again find myself personally spending a lot of time both reading and leaving comments. But so what, it was still worthwhile!

  137. Can I just say what a comfort to discover somebody that truly knows what they’re talking about on the net. You definitely know how to bring a problem to light and make it important. A lot more people should check this out and understand this side of your story. I can’t believe you are not more popular since you most certainly possess the gift.

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  139. I must thank you for the efforts you have put in penning this site. I’m hoping to check out the same high-grade content from you in the future as well. In truth, your creative writing abilities has encouraged me to get my own site now 😉

  140. Hello there, I do think your blog could possibly be having web browser compatibility problems. When I take a look at your website in Safari, it looks fine however when opening in IE, it’s got some overlapping issues. I simply wanted to provide you with a quick heads up! Other than that, wonderful website!

  141. After I initially commented I seem to have clicked the -Notify me when new comments are added- checkbox and from now on every time a comment is added I recieve 4 emails with the exact same comment. Perhaps there is a means you can remove me from that service? Thanks!

  142. This is the right web site for everyone who wishes to understand this topic. You understand a whole lot its almost hard to argue with you (not that I really would want to…HaHa). You definitely put a fresh spin on a subject that has been discussed for a long time. Excellent stuff, just excellent!

  143. May I simply just say what a comfort to find someone that really knows what they are discussing on the internet. You certainly realize how to bring an issue to light and make it important. More and more people really need to check this out and understand this side of the story. I was surprised that you aren’t more popular given that you most certainly possess the gift.

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  146. An outstanding share! I’ve just forwarded this onto a co-worker who had been conducting a little research on this. And he in fact bought me breakfast simply because I stumbled upon it for him… lol. So let me reword this…. Thank YOU for the meal!! But yeah, thanx for spending some time to talk about this issue here on your web site.

  147. Hi there! This post could not be written any better! Going through this article reminds me of my previous roommate! He always kept preaching about this. I will send this information to him. Fairly certain he’ll have a very good read. Many thanks for sharing!

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